ABSOLUTE UNCERTAINTY

The path of self discovery is perhaps one of the toughest journeys any individual undertakes. On the way you find so many wonderful new things, your perceptions are challenged and your very basis of life takes blow by blow of hardcore reality. Life is a twisted tale with no real end except death. You grow with a feeling of never changing, but every new stage in life changes you in such magnitude that you tend to loose touch with that person you were once. What exactly is this world? World in reality is a large collection of symbiotic existence between mankind. However on a smaller scale and in a more relative sense ‘the world’ is defined by the people who comprise of your surroundings. With every new aspect of life you are made to face newer people with different aspirations, ideals and perceptions. An idealistic start is what basic schooling gives you to life. So many factors decide an individuals belief’s and ideas. So much changes and so many times you are forced too change. This change actually originates from the will to stay happy. Every individual in this world wants to be happy and have a happy life. But again happiness is relative. Relativity is such a predominant factor hence eliminating absolution from life. Yet ever relative perception we create and every new ideal we hamper arises with the will of absolution. The clash of ideas between two people remains healthy as long as it incorporates positive change however when your very own perception of life is challenged or you start becoming someone you never were, you tend to either put up a defensive front and fight this imposing change, or accept it and alter your own ideas thus resulting in the uncertainty of whether change is good or not. Fact of the matter is change may be good or maybe bad but in the end change is inevitable. A person has to change according to the world around for acceptance and also for existence. The survival instincts inside us often overpower our fixations and perceptions.
Everything new stimulates doubt and uncertainty inside an individual’s head. New feelings, that you decided you’d never have or never knew existed, creep into your head from some corner leading you into this hopeless pit of confusion and darkness. Darkness that challenges your very firm decision of eliminating the possibility of feeling something new and remaining in the light. Life is tough very tough and every new chapter brings more and more confusion. Those who say they know what they are doing with their life also experience this. At an early age where innocence is still a prominent aspect of your thoughts you tend to plan out life. At least you tend to plan out the things you never want to happen to yourself, however plans are only for paperwork. Real life kicks in when these plans fall out flat on the ground. And you stand face to face with harsh heart shattering reality. You can either lock yourself from the world or at least a part of you that you never want to loose or just go ahead and change according to circumstances thus always leaving you lost and converting you into someone or something you once despised. The world is divided into cynics and dreamers. Cynics dominate thought and reality while dreamers dominate feelings and possibility. Its always easier to mould yourself the way the world wants to mould you. Initially things might be tough but with time just going with the flow seems easier. And people who take this path are transformed into this hopeless machine that the factory of the world produces on a large scale. Shallowness, loosing touch with oneself and believing everything even remotely cynical are the probable symptoms. Self belief shakes and acceptance towards everything creeps in giving birth to lack of faith. Faith and reality for a cynic are two opposing poles but for someone who refuses the ways of the world faith is reality. Its tough to not change and stick to your self. Not changing is often synonymous to a rebel or a radical or an outcast. But not changing doesn’t necessary imply an anti social element. After all society is really just a dominating thought process and just on the basis of dominance such thought cant be considered fact. By refusing to let the world change you is to not let the world tell you how to think or how to feel. The basic will to question is fast diminishing with every passing generation. People have begun to really accept everything they are told without questioning. Practicality is fast turning as an excuse to do what the world wants you to do. It not about rebelling against the forces that want to tell you how to think but it is a question of the basic
need for justification. A good salesman can convince you to change almost anything inside you and under the context of that being the only way for your survival. Its about not selling out. Every genius in his/her time was an outcast purely because he/she refused to accept what everyone had accepted without questioning. Life is a hard journey where at every moment, at every turn you are forced to alter yourself drastically. Preservation of one’s self and adjustment to the ways of the world are not two contradictory scenarios. Changing yourself to the extent that the world can accept you and refusing to change to the extent that the world should dominate you are two very difficult things to achieve simultaneously.
It all narrows down to the simple fact that the world is a big huge corporate that wants to produce as many machines as it can to maximize output no matter what and every individual is a fighter fighting out there all alone. Each one would have his/her own aspirations and expectations from life and many fail to achieve even a single one of them. Not many win these battles against the system, many manage to win but are ostracized on account of their rebellion but there is a third kind, a very rare category of people who don’t let the battle decide their fate. Self preservation and propelling oneself higher into the world are the symbiotic conditions that elevate and individual and make life as a journey easier. Not everyone will accept your true thinking, many don’t understand it and many more pretend not to understand it. But the journey is an individualistic journey and if traversed tactfully can actually leave you in a position to be in love with the person you have become.